In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife) - 1256365

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b-1 83
In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife) - 1256365

Today marks one year since I held your hand and kissed you goodbye. Life goes on, but I'll never stop loving you or missing you.

Bruce

JimC
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Bruce,

Thank you for thinking of GRACE at this time. We remember you as a tireless caregiver and advocate/researcher for your dear Kathy. I know that she would want you not only to remember, but also find happiness. In the wise words of our dear late friend Simon54:

"I think so much about how my wife, and other loved ones, will handle my death when it comes. She is not well able to talk about it now, perhaps she will never be with me, I don't yet know. Whatever may be my grief now, it comes to an end then, whilst perhaps it is only then that her grief will truly break out. I need to believe that as she lives on she will find happiness again, and will remember me in love. I hope still to be a part of that happiness ahead of her, not just as 'memory', but also because I believe people change one another through love."

I am certain that the love you shared (and continue to share) with her has changed you in many good ways, the lasting legacy of that love.

Peace, comfort and joy to you, Bruce.

JimC
Forum moderator

<p>I began visiting GRACE in July, 2008 when my wife Liz was diagnosed with lung cancer, and became a forum moderator in January, 2010. My beloved wife of 30 years passed away Nov. 4, 2011 after battling stage IV lung cancer for 3 years and 4 months</p>

catdander
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Hi Bruce, I know this day must bring back the most raw of feelings for you. I hope Jim and Simon's words are helpful.
I hope you find peace,
Janine

Dr West
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

You were a tireless advocate for her. I have incredible respect for the caregivers who provided more comfort than any doctor or medicine could. Your love and memory honor her.

-Dr. West

+++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dr. Howard (Jack) West
Medical Oncologist
City of Hope Cancer Center
Duarte, CA

Founder & President
Global Resource for Advancing
Cancer Education

certain spring
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Really glad to hear from you again, B1-83 (that is how I still think of you!) Grief is such an all- consuming process, and the one-year anniversary is an important marker. Well done for getting this far.

marisa93
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Bruce,

I know that this must be a tough day for you so thank you for taking the time to stop by here. I hope your memories of Kathy are helping you find peace and comfort as each day passes.

Lisa

double trouble
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

I hope some of the pain is turning into cherished sweet memories. You were her hero.
Debra

laya d.
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

I just now came upon this and wanted to send you my love. I can't believe it's already been a year because in my topsy-turvy mind it seems like my Mom and Kathy were just here...and that we all were tirelessly discussing and plotting what to do next. Anyway, I hope you're doing OK. . .Thanks for checking in. . .

Much Love,
Laya

b-1 83
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

A quick note on my new avatar - A buddy and I are convinced that Kathy sent me this rainbow on my last day in Africa just to say "Way to go! You finially went to Africa like you always dreamed!"

catdander
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Love it!

Dr West
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

That's wonderful!

-Dr. West

+++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dr. Howard (Jack) West
Medical Oncologist
City of Hope Cancer Center
Duarte, CA

Founder & President
Global Resource for Advancing
Cancer Education

laya d.
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Fantastic!!!!!! So happy to hear from you, Bruce. . .

xoxo,
Laya

marisa93
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

I'm sure that Kathy is very happy that you went and that rainbow is her smile:) Glad you are well!

Lisa

b-1 83
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

It's been said that the second year is the toughest. In some ways I believe it. I can't believe it has been 2 years since Kathy passed. The bad days are fewer and fewer, but the memories still come flooding back on occasion. I'm fortunate to have met a wonderful widow who understands the times of pain. Like Kathy, she is a teacher. I understand her, too. :)

catdander
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Bruce so good to hear from you. It's good to know the bad days continue to decrease but I can imagine it hits like a ton of bricks. I'm glad you've met someone who understands and accepts Kathy in your life.
:) Janine

JimC
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Bruce,

Being six months ahead of you in the process, I understand exactly what you mean. I think that because the bad days are fewer, each of them hits harder. But I also know how good it is to be with someone who understands from experience, even if that means that there are twice as many rough days for the two of you. Lisa and I know that Mark and Liz remain an essential part of our lives and having come together because of them, we feel that all four of us will be bound together forever.

Enjoy your second chance at happiness, friend.

JimC
Forum moderator

<p>I began visiting GRACE in July, 2008 when my wife Liz was diagnosed with lung cancer, and became a forum moderator in January, 2010. My beloved wife of 30 years passed away Nov. 4, 2011 after battling stage IV lung cancer for 3 years and 4 months</p>

Dr West
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Bruce,

Nobody should ever minimize your grief, but people like Jim and Lisa and others here can relate like many other people cannot. The key message is that it is possible to find love and happiness again, you deserve that, and you can still honor Kathy's memory. I have to imagine that Kathy would want that. You did everything you possibly could.

-Dr. West

+++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dr. Howard (Jack) West
Medical Oncologist
City of Hope Cancer Center
Duarte, CA

Founder & President
Global Resource for Advancing
Cancer Education

bobradinsky
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Bruce

I'm a little behind you in the healing process. I am happy for you that you have found someone else to share your life with and I'm sure it helps that you have the loss of a spouse in common. I find your words encouraging. I still follow Grace. I don't really know why. Sometimes I feel like a moth drawn to a light, but Grace helped me so much during her fight that it has become a ritual with me to check in most nights before retiring. Best wishes to you as you rebuild your life. Bob

laya d.
Reply To: In memory of Kathy Henderson (Teacher Wife)

Bruce. . .

Thank you so much for checking in. "Year 2" certainly is booting my behind quite a bit on the days where I just plain ole' miss and want my Mom. . .This past Sunday having been Mother's Day was pretty darn hard. But, I think that we all learn to move forward somehow...while cursing cancer all the way...

Much love,
Laya

b-1 83
Year 3 has now passed. My

Year 3 has now passed. My how time flies........ The bad days really are fewer and fewer, but when one hits, it is tough. I often wonder how I made it through those 2 1/2 years of her treatment. I could have missed the pain, but I'd of had to miss the dance.....

catdander
Hi Bruce, It's hard to

Hi Bruce, It's hard to believe it's been 3 years. I'm glad bad days are fewer but from my mom's loss of my dad I know 3 years is really nothing compared to what you've lost. Thank you for memorializing her with us.
Janine